I am tired Lord Daddy

My mind a raging hell

Blood and parts pieces

Clutter up my mind

I can hear whistling

Of lung air escaping

CPR no chest to compress

I taste his blood

Why will it not go away

Why has it come to stay

I am tired

So very tired

I wrote a letter to my Dad

But think about never had

One that did run away

Will I have strength to stay

I want it to be quiet

For my mind to go away

I rest in You Daddy Lord

But it doesn’t go away

Maybe it will never go away

Maybe it has come to stay

What round is it today

Punch drunk another day

I wrote a letter to Dad today

September 7, 2024

“1 ¶ «A Song of Ascents.» Behold, bless the LORD, All you servants of the LORD, Who by night stand in the house of the LORD! 2 Lift up your hands in the sanctuary, And bless the LORD. 3 The LORD who made heaven and earth Bless you from Zion!” (Psalm 134:1-3 NKJV)

I worship the Lord as my day begins

I bless the Lord as I serve and work

I lift hands to the Lord in the sanctuary

I stand in the house of the Lord by night

I bless the Lord

Who made heaven

Who made the earth

I bless the Lord

Prayerful question: Do I pray “without ceasing” and seek to bless the Lord?

September 6, 2024

“1 ¶ «A Song of Ascents. Of David.» Behold, how good and how pleasant it is For brethren to dwell together in unity! 2 It is like the precious oil upon the head, Running down on the beard, The beard of Aaron, Running down on the edge of his garments. 3 It is like the dew of Hermon, Descending upon the mountains of Zion; For there the LORD commanded the blessing—Life forevermore.” (Ps 133:1-3 NKJV)

Those who love and serve God gather

Gather and receive the joy of the Lord

Gather and be strengthen in adversity

God loves when His children are together

Prayerful question: Do I pray for the unity of the “Holy Catholic Church”? (The Holy Catholic Church is the body of Christ and should not be confused with the Roman Catholic Church which is a denomination.)

September 5, 2024

“11 ¶ The LORD has sworn in truth to David; He will not turn from it: “I will set upon your throne the fruit of your body. 12 If your sons will keep My covenant And My testimony which I shall teach them, Their sons also shall sit upon your throne forevermore.” 13 For the LORD has chosen Zion; He has desired it for His dwelling place: 14 “This is My resting place forever; Here I will dwell, for I have desired it. 15 I will abundantly bless her provision; I will satisfy her poor with bread. 16 I will also clothe her priests with salvation, And her saints shall shout aloud for joy. 17 There I will make the horn of David grow; I will prepare a lamp for My Anointed. 18 His enemies I will clothe with shame, But upon Himself His crown shall flourish.”” (Psalm 132:11-18 NKJV)

The Lord God Almighty is Truth

God will not turn from the Truth

I will be the dwelling place of God

Prayerful question: Do I believe God is Truth as I pray?

September 4, 2024

“6 Behold, we heard of it in Ephrathah; We found it in the fields of the woods. 7 Let us go into His tabernacle; Let us worship at His footstool. 8 Arise, O LORD, to Your resting place, You and the ark of Your strength. 9 Let Your priests be clothed with righteousness, And let Your saints shout for joy. 10 For Your servant David’s sake, Do not turn away the face of Your Anointed.” (Psalm 132:6-10 NKJV)

The universe is the thrown of God and the earth is His footstool

May I join in worship the Lord God as I dwell in His footstool

In Righteousness I know You face me and I shout for joy

Prayerful question: Does my prayer become a time of worship and joy?

The shadows are not a dwelling place

The shadows are a place of fear

There is no floor with the shadows

There is no foundation with the shadows

There is no walls with the shadows

There is no ceiling with the shadows

There is no door with the shadows

You are stuck with the shadows

only the shadows

May God help you – no one else can

September 3, 2024

“1 ¶ «A Song of Ascents.» LORD, remember David And all his afflictions; 2 How he swore to the LORD, And vowed to the Mighty One of Jacob: 3 “Surely I will not go into the chamber of my house, Or go up to the comfort of my bed; 4 I will not give sleep to my eyes Or slumber to my eyelids, 5 Until I find a place for the LORD, A dwelling place for the Mighty One of Jacob.”” (Psalm 132:1-5 NKJV)

Remember my afflictions God

forgive my foolish vows God

I will be a dwelling place for God

then I can sleep and slumber

Prayerful question: Does being a dwelling place of God change how I pray?

September 2, 2024

“1 ¶ «A Song of Ascents. Of David.» LORD, my heart is not haughty, Nor my eyes lofty. Neither do I concern myself with great matters, Nor with things too profound for me. 2 Surely I have calmed and quieted my soul, Like a weaned child with his mother; Like a weaned child is my soul within me. 3 O Israel, hope in the LORD From this time forth and forever.” (Psalm 131:1-3 NKJV)

Help me not to look too high or low

Help me not be destructively proud

Let me be calm and have a quiet soul

Forever my hope is in the Lord God

Prayerful question: Do I pray with a quiet and peaceful soul?

There can be no alliance between the living and the dead

They cannot work together without destruction

Shadows and demons can for they are both death

September 1, 2024

“5 ¶ I wait for the LORD, my soul waits, And in His word I do hope. 6 My soul waits for the Lord More than those who watch for the morning— Yes, more than those who watch for the morning. 7 O Israel, hope in the LORD; For with the LORD there is mercy, And with Him is abundant redemption. 8 And He shall redeem Israel From all his iniquities.” (Psalm 130:5-8 NKJV)

My soul waits upon God

trusting in God’s word

I place my hope in the Lord

trusting in His redemption

Prayerful question: Do I begin praying by confessing and seeking God’s mercy and redemption?

“It brought me a pain that burnt my bones.”

I heard this in a TV show and immediately I grasped hold of the words and partial clarity overcame me. Through my mind so many parts of my life flowed by and for a moment my heart stopped as I recognized my own pain. My bones burn and my body is on fire. Dying is too good for me and life is beyond me. This is what happens when you play with shadows.

August 31, 2024

“1 ¶ «A Song of Ascents.» Out of the depths I have cried to You, O LORD; 2 Lord, hear my voice! Let Your ears be attentive To the voice of my supplications. 3 If You, LORD, should mark iniquities, O Lord, who could stand? 4 But there is forgiveness with You, That You may be feared.” (Psalm 130:1-4 NKJV)

I cry to God from my despair

Do You hear my scream

God will You hear my prayer

Do You hear my scream

Prayerful question: Does God hear my screams when I pray?

Do you see them

Barely see them

The shadows are

They are here

All around us

Are they bad

Bad they are

Evil shadows

Want to hurt

Want to harm

They are evil

Evil are they

August 30, 2024

“5 ¶ Let all those who hate Zion Be put to shame and turned back. 6 Let them be as the grass on the housetops, Which withers before it grows up, 7 With which the reaper does not fill his hand, Nor he who binds sheaves, his arms. 8 Neither let those who pass by them say, “The blessing of the LORD be upon you; We bless you in the name of the LORD!”” (Psalm 129:5-8 NKJV)

May those who hate God

be put to shame

May those who hate God’s people

be put to shame

Prayerful question: Do I pray for those who seek to harm God and His people to be shamed into grace?

August 29, 2024

“1 ¶ «A Song of Ascents.» “Many a time they have afflicted me from my youth,” Let Israel now say— 2 “Many a time they have afflicted me from my youth; Yet they have not prevailed against me. 3 The plowers plowed on my back; They made their furrows long.” 4 The LORD is righteous; He has cut in pieces the cords of the wicked.” (Psalm 129:1-4 NKJV)

I have been afflicted from the beginning

The pain, suffering and shame weaken me

They plow deep scars in my body and soul

Jesus bore those scars and defeated them

Prayerful question: Do I pray believing the God who gave His life for me will not withhold any good thing from me?

“5 But he was pierced for our rebellion,

crushed for our sins.

He was beaten so we could be whole.

He was whipped so we could be healed.

6 All of us, like sheep, have strayed away.

We have left God’s paths to follow our own.

Yet the LORD laid on him

the sins of us all.” (Isaiah 53:5-6 NLT)

Are those who shame me shadows

or used by shadows

Are those who hate me shadows

or used by shadows

Are those who harm me shadows

or used by shadows

When I harm others am I a shadow

or used by shadows

(What part do shadows play in the lives of those who either do or do not serve God?)

August 28, 2024

“1 ¶ «A Song of Ascents.» Blessed is every one who fears the LORD, Who walks in His ways. 2 When you eat the labor of your hands, You shall be happy, and it shall be well with you. 3 Your wife shall be like a fruitful vine In the very heart of your house, Your children like olive plants All around your table. 4 Behold, thus shall the man be blessed Who fears the LORD. 5 The LORD bless you out of Zion, And may you see the good of Jerusalem All the days of your life. 6 Yes, may you see your children’s children. Peace be upon Israel!” (Psalm 128:1-6 NKJV)

It is blessed to fear God

It is blessed to work hard

It is blessed to love your wife

It is blessed to fear God

Prayerful question: Do I count my blessings as I pray to make it through another day?

August 27, 2024

“1 ¶ «A Song of Ascents. Of Solomon.» Unless the LO

RD builds the house, They labor in vain who build it; Unless the LORD guards the city, The watchman stays awake in vain. 2 It is vain for you to rise up early, To sit up late, To eat the bread of sorrows; For so He gives His beloved sleep. 3 Behold, children are a heritage from the LORD, The fruit of the womb is a reward. 4 Like arrows in the hand of a warrior, So are the children of one’s youth. 5 Happy is the man who has his quiver full of them; They shall not be ashamed, But shall speak with their enemies in the gate.” (Psalm 127:1-5 NKJV)

We built it

It is temporary

God built it

It is eternal

Prayerful question: Do I seek eternal results from my daily prayer?

If I could only feel

Shadows are spiritual neuropathy

numbness not felt instead of pain

an undead emotionless numbness

left nolove, nojoy and a nonperson

With shadows love turns into fear

With shadows hope becomes despair

With shadows joy becomes numb

With shadows numbness is what is

I am weary from the weariness

I am empty from the emptiness

I am numb from the numbness

With the shadows I AM NOT

August 26, 2024

“4 ¶ Bring back our captivity, O LORD, As the streams in the South. 5 Those who sow in tears Shall reap in joy. 6 He who continually goes forth weeping, Bearing seed for sowing, Shall doubtless come again with rejoicing, Bringing his sheaves with him.” (Psalm 126:4-6 NKJV)

Bring us back from captivity God

We have sowed seeds of destruction

Turn it into a harvest of salvation

Rejoicing as we bring as our sheaves

Prayerful question: Does my prayer remember my BC (before Christ) life to show God’s grace since AD (Anno Domini – The year of the Lord and the year God redeemed us!!!)?

August 25, 2024

“1 ¶ «A Song of Ascents.» When the LORD brought back the captivity of Zion, We were like those who dream. 2 Then our mouth was filled with laughter, And our tongue with singing. Then they said among the nations, “The LORD has done great things for them.” 3 The LORD has done great things for us, And we are glad.” (Psalm 126:1-3 NKJV)

Free me God

So I shall laugh

So I shall sing

So I shall praise

Prayerful question: Does my prayer include times of rejoicing in God’s redemption?

August 24, 2024

“4 ¶ Do good, O LORD, to those who are good, And to those who are upright in their hearts. 5 As for such as turn aside to their crooked ways, The LORD shall lead them away With the workers of iniquity. Peace be upon Israel!” (Psalm 125:4-5 NKJV)

God will have mercy on the merciful

Please have mercy on me when I do not

God blesses those who walk in the Way

Please guide me back to Jesus the Way

Prayerful question: Do I pray for the merciful and the merciless?

“Forgive us our trespasses as we (to the same degree) forgive those who trespass against us.”

Shadows come and they go

Ever wonder were they go

As they walk along the way

Hope they don’t come to stay

August 23, 2024

“1 ¶ «A Song of Ascents.» Those who trust in the LORD Are like Mount Zion, Which cannot be moved, but abides forever. 2 As the mountains surround Jerusalem, So the LORD surrounds His people From this time forth and forever. 3 For the scepter of wickedness shall not rest On the land allotted to the righteous, Lest the righteous reach out their hands to iniquity.” (Ps 125:1-3 NKJV)

If I trust in God I will not be moved

I will stand the sure foundation of God

Like the mountains I will stand firm

I will stand as a barrier against evil

Prayerful question: Do I prayer for God’s strength to stand with God and against evil?

shadowsence

I don’t want to let go

I can’t let it go

Why can’t I let it go

Do I want to let it go

I don’t want to let it go

(shadowsence is nonsense)

August 22, 2024

“6 ¶ Blessed be the LORD, Who has not given us as prey to their teeth. 7 Our soul has escaped as a bird from the snare of the fowlers; The snare is broken, and we have escaped. 8 Our help is in the name of the LORD, Who made heaven and earth.” (Psalm 124:6-8 NKJV)

If it were not for God I would be entrapped

If it were not for God I would be destroyed

If it were not for God I would not escape

If it were not for God I would have no help

Prayerful question: Does my prayer celebrate the God who made heaven and earth is my help and hope?

How can a shadow weigh so much

Shadows seem almost weightless

Their burden is beyond measure

The pain rips my body and soul

I screamed and nobody heard

I cried and no tears would fall

The shadows cut off the Light

They cut me off from the Light

Not dark but not light either

How can a shadow weigh so much

August 21, 2024

“1 ¶ «A Song of Ascents. Of David.» “If it had not been the LORD who was on our side,” Let Israel now say— 2 “If it had not been the LORD who was on our side, When men rose up against us, 3 Then they would have swallowed us alive, When their wrath was kindled against us; 4 Then the waters would have overwhelmed us, The stream would have gone over our soul; 5 Then the swollen waters Would have gone over our soul.”” (Psalm 124:1-5 NKJV)

If God is not on our side

evil would swallow us

wrath would destroy us

our souls would drown

Prayerful question: Does my prayer recognize my dependence on God?

Walking among the shadows makes you unreal

Trying to be someone else brings shrinkage

Less of you and more of a shadow person

The more time with shadows the less real

Walk about nor your life in not your clothes

Working in not your job funding not your life

You cannot know yourself or even others

You are a shadow person or unperson

Slowly slipping from life to existence

Becoming a nonhuman shadow person

August 20, 2024

“1 ¶ «A Song of Ascents.» Unto You I lift up my eyes, O You who dwell in the heavens. 2 Behold, as the eyes of servants look to the hand of their masters, As the eyes of a maid to the hand of her mistress, So our eyes look to the LORD our God, Until He has mercy on us. 3 Have mercy on us, O LORD, have mercy on us! For we are exceedingly filled with contempt. 4 Our soul is exceedingly filled With the scorn of those who are at ease, With the contempt of the proud.” (Psalm 123:1-4 NKJV)

To the Heavenly King

I lift up my eyes

To my Heavenly Master

I lift up my eyes

Till God shows mercy

I lift up my eyes

To the God of all mercy

I lift up my soul

Prayerful question: Do I pray to lift in praise the God who lifted me?

Shadow people

walking among shadows makes you unreal

trying to be someone else brings shrinkage

less of you and more of a shadow person

the more time with shadows the less real

walk about not your life in not your clothes

working in not your job funding not your life

you cannot know yourself or even others

you are a shadow person or unperson

slowly slipping from life to existence

becoming a nonhuman shadow person

August 19, 2024

“1 ¶ «A Song of Ascents. Of David.» I was glad when they said to me, “Let us go into the house of the LORD.” 2 Our feet have been standing Within your gates, O Jerusalem! 3 Jerusalem is built As a city that is compact together, 4 Where the tribes go up, The tribes of the LORD, To the Testimony of Israel, To give thanks to the name of the LORD. 5 For thrones are set there for judgment, The thrones of the house of David.”

“6 ¶ Pray for the peace of Jerusalem: “May they prosper who love you. 7 Peace be within your walls, Prosperity within your palaces.” 8 For the sake of my brethren and companions, I will now say, “Peace be within you.” 9 Because of the house of the LORD our God I will seek your good.” (Psalm 122:1-9 NKJV)

Do I long to gather in worship of God

Do I believe Christianity is community

Do I love to gather and give God thanks

I will for my love of God and the Church

Prayerful question: As I pray do I unite with God and the Church?

Do not not despair God is with you

You will despair if you do not believe

August 18, 2024

“1 ¶ «A Song of Ascents.» I will lift up my eyes to the hills—From whence comes my help? 2 My help comes from the LORD, Who made heaven and earth. 3 He will not allow your foot to be moved; He who keeps you will not slumber. 4 Behold, He who keeps Israel Shall neither slumber nor sleep. 5 The LORD is your keeper; The LORD is your shade at your right hand. 6 The sun shall not strike you by day, Nor the moon by night. 7 The LORD shall preserve you from all evil; He shall preserve your soul. 8 The LORD shall preserve your going out and your coming in From this time forth, and even forevermore.” (Psalm 121:1-8 NKJV)

When life beats me up I look down in fear and weariness

I will lift up my eyes to the hills—From whence comes my help?

The LORD shall preserve you from all evil; He shall preserve your soul.

Behold, He who keeps Israel Shall neither slumber nor sleep.

Prayerful question: Does my prayer look down in despair or call out to God to be our hope and help?

Do not not despair God is with you

You will despair if you do not believe

Shadows – dying to get away

Somebody make feel alive and shatter me

If I break the glass, than I’ll have to fly

There’s no one to catch me if I take a dive

I’m scared of changing, the days stay the same

The world is spinning but only in gray

only

Somebody shine a light

I’m frozen by the fear in me

Somebody make feel alive and shatter me

(Shatter Me by Lindsey Stirling)

Have you ever heard a song for the first time yet felt you knew it? This song is written about a dancer imprisoned in a snow globe desiring to be set free from the gray but held back by fear.

It is true we cannot break ourselves from what traps us and sucks life from us like a spiritual vampire but we must play our part by at least desiring someone to break the glass keeping from the Light and Life.

It is true only God can break the glass and safely catch us when we fall up from the shadows to His Light. Only God can set us free if we are to truly be free.

I begin by praying God will give me the desire and courage to pray for Him to banish the shadows and set me free. Even from myself.

August 17, 2024

“1 ¶ «A Song of Ascents.» In my distress I cried to the LORD, And He heard me. 2 Deliver my soul, O LORD, from lying lips And from a deceitful tongue. 3 What shall be given to you, Or what shall be done to you, You false tongue? 4 Sharp arrows of the warrior, With coals of the broom tree!”

“5 ¶ Woe is me, that I dwell in Meshech, That I dwell among the tents of Kedar! 6 My soul has dwelt too long With one who hates peace. 7 I am for peace; But when I speak, they are for war.” (Psalm 120:1-7 NKJV)

I cry out to God

I scream to God

Woe is me

God heard me

Prayerful question: Does my prayer at times become a scream of need for God? If not then why not?

The ascent psalms were a call to ascend the hill leading to the Temple and worship God. They would slowly walk toward the Temple singing these psalms and like church bells call people to gather in worship.

As we leave Psalm 119 take time to write 3 discoveries God revealed to you.

1

2

3

This is the longest book in the Bible and that alone shows how important Psalm 119 is.

August 16, 2024

“169 ¶ TAU. Let my cry come before You, O LORD; Give me understanding according to Your word. 170 Let my supplication come before You; Deliver me according to Your word.”

“171 ¶ My lips shall utter praise, For You teach me Your statutes.”

“172 ¶ My tongue shall speak of Your word, For all Your commandments are righteousness.”

“173 ¶ Let Your hand become my help, For I have chosen Your precepts. 174 I long for Your salvation, O LORD, And Your law is my delight.”

“175 ¶ Let my soul live, and it shall praise You; And let Your judgments help me. 176 ¶ I have gone astray like a lost sheep; Seek Your servant, For I do not forget Your commandments.” (Psalm 119:169-176 NKJV)

Let my cry come before You

My lips shall utter praise

My tongue shall speak of Your word

Let my soul live, and it shall praise You

Prayerful question: Do I let all of me love all of God as I pray?

August 15, 2024

“161 ¶ SHIN. Princes persecute me without a cause, But my heart stands in awe of Your word.”

“162 ¶ I rejoice at Your word As one who finds great treasure.”

“163 ¶ I hate and abhor lying, But I love Your law.”

“164 ¶ Seven times a day I praise You, Because of Your righteous judgments.”

“165 ¶ Great peace have those who love Your law, And nothing causes them to stumble.”

“166 ¶ LORD, I hope for Your salvation, And I do Your commandments.”

“167 ¶ My soul keeps Your testimonies, And I love them exceedingly. 168 I keep Your precepts and Your testimonies, For all my ways are before You.” (Ps 119:161-168 NKJV)

The Bible is precious

Is mine dust covered

Is my Bible unread

Read God’s revelation

Prayerful question: Do I use the Bible to enrich my prayer life?

August 14, 2024

“153 ¶ RESH. Consider my affliction and deliver me, For I do not forget Your law. 154 Plead my cause and redeem me; Revive me according to Your word.”

“155 ¶ Salvation is far from the wicked, For they do not seek Your statutes.”

“156 ¶ Great are Your tender mercies, O LORD; Revive me according to Your judgments.”

“157 ¶ Many are my persecutors and my enemies, Yet I do not turn from Your testimonies.”

“158 ¶ I see the treacherous, and am disgusted, Because they do not keep Your word.”

“159 ¶ Consider how I love Your precepts; Revive me, O LORD, according to Your lovingkindness. 160 ¶ The entirety of Your word is truth, And every one of Your righteous judgments endures forever.” (Ps 119:153-160 NKJV)

Can the wicked be saved

Can my enemies be saved

Can the treacherous be saved

Great are Your tender mercies, O LORD

Prayerful question: Do I thank God for His mercy and pray for even my enemies to be saved?